KALEIDOSCOPE

The Christmas tree stands as a focal point of many people’s decorations.  Set in a prominent place, its lights and decorations create a special, festive mood.

For years, the decorating of the house and tree was a family activity.  After breakfast, we lugged the boxes of decorations out of the basement.   With the surfaces dusted, we carefully packed away all the routine decorations that sat out for ten to eleven months out of the year so there was space for the Christmas decorations.

The mantle was dedicated to Santa’s village and the stockings were hung in wait for Santa.  Tables held figures of trees, Santas, snowmen, nutcrackers, special Christmas books, and anything else that looked Christmasy.

For the first couple of years after I was first married, we went out and purchased a live tree a week and a half to two weeks before Christmas.  One year, however, there had been a shortage of trees and we trudged from tree lot to tree lot only to find them closed.  This was the year we purchased an artificial tree, and even those were in short supply.  The tree stood in front of the front picture window that was lined with lights.  Then, we put the lights on the tree.  Finally, the box of ornaments was opened.  I took the ornaments out one by one and unwrapped them.  After I put a hook on the end, I gave my two boys, alternately, the job of putting the ornaments on the tree.  Some years the ornaments all seemed to be on one side, but I never rearranged them.  Although my youngest is now 22, I was honored that he wanted to help decorate the tree this year.

The decorating was followed by enjoying a glass of eggnog.  We rounded the evening off by snuggling up together on the couch and watching the movie Prancer.  As the movie came to a close, my sleepy boys got ready for bed and we finished the evening off with a Christmas themed story.

My boys are grown now and as I decorated the house this year, I found myself missing those old traditions.

It was tradition in our family to give gifts to all unmarried cousins that had not yet graduated from high school or college.  It was also tradition to give a gift to the households of those who were married; these gifts usually consisted of candles, holiday knick knacks, holiday towels, or homemade edible goods.

Money was tight the year my oldest was born and we were struggling to figure out what to give as the house to house gifts.  I finally decided that it would be fun to make several kinds of candy and create a candy sampler for our gift to each house.  (I hate gifts that will probably get thrown out or put up for sale at the next garage sale.)

I had my mother come over and we turned the kitchen into candy making central.  We made fudge, marzipan, three layer jelly candies, rum balls, creme de minthe  balls, caramels, and even marshmallows.

We still talk and laugh about the “stained glass” candy we made.  We made the hard candy syrup and, as the directions said, poured into a pan lined with foil.  Then, we proceeded to snip the cooling candy with scissors and drop it into powdered sugar to cool.  The idea was to make several batches of different colors and flavors and combine them into a glass jar.  They looked pretty; however, our fingers were burned and sore by the time we finished; the candy had to be snipped before it cooled.

Later, someone told us that we should have worn white gloves to avoid burning our fingers.  Oh, well, live and learn.

As Christmas approaches, I find myself remembering Christmas traditions of old and of special experiences of past Christmas seasons.  One of the first holiday tasks began the Friday after Thanksgiving.  This was the day that my grandmother began the task of baking numerous kinds of Christmas cookies; one year, I remember, she made almost 30 different kinds.  Anyway, the first batch of cookies to be made were pepparkakor (Swedish ginger cookies) because, as she said, they had the longest shelf life.  These were followed by rolled sugar cookies, spritz, caramel spritz, oatmeal date sandwich cookies, Christmas cherries, marzipan squares, dreams, melting moments, and other recipes that would be new for the year.

When the bus dropped me off from school, if it was a cookie baking day, my grandfather would be waiting to pick me up.  Then, it was off to his house where I got to make my own cookies out of the scrap dough.  See, my grandmother would only work with a portion of the dough so many times and then it would get put into a bowl and refridgerated until I got there to form my own cookies.  As the cookies came out, slightly over done cookies, broken cookies, and the edges of bar cookies would become tasting scraps, but the “good” cookies would be carefully packed into the “correct” jars and tins and placed in the pantry.

Gram loved entertaining during the holidays and her guests would always enjoy a wide variety of cookies on the cookie tray.   If I was lucky, I was the one who would arrange the cookie tray, and I would be allowed to take one or two of my favorite cookies.  I have tried to adopt this yearly tradition that my grandmother had, but I begin with wonderful plans that rarely are completed due to the complexities of life.

As the temperature drops and the rain turns to snow, it is important to check the winter supplies in your trunk, replacing broken items and refreshing old items.  So, what might you need in your trunk for winter weather in the northern states?  Check the list and add some of your own ideas.

*scraper with snow brush

*an extra pair of gloves

*a shovel

*towing chain (especially if you are driving a 4 wheel drive vehicle)

*blankets

*a flashlight (with extra batteries)

*flares and / or a safety triangle

*a flattened box (This is useful under tires when you can’t get traction on ice.)

*chemical heat packs

When you are traveling, there are some other items you might want to take with you that may or may not be safety items.  These include a bottle of water, your cell phone, and energy bars or some other snack.  Be sure to wear a hat, gloves, and even a scarf.

Although my children and step-children are adults, my husband and I still ask them to put together a Christmas wish list.  The children have vastly different personalities that range from “I don’t know what I want,” to “anything dragons and Twilight books,” to “I want a laptop (in a specific color) and collector trucks,” to “You and Dad should put aside your differences and all of you chip in to buy me a voice amplification system.”

My husband and I have never hid our monetary situation from our children, so I find it interesting that some of our children have no clue about how to ask for presents in times where money is tight.  We have set about a $20.00 - $25.00 spending amount on each of the children.  It is difficult, however, to find presents for that price.  If you are trying to shop on a tight budget, here are a few suggestions.

*Paper back books

*Magazine subscription

*Movies

*CDs of favorite groups or musicians

*A themed basket (If you put it together, it is much cheaper than the pre-packaged ones they sell in many stores.  Creating your own also allows you to choose things you know the people like.)

-A collection of coffees & cookies

-A variety of popcorns for the microwave and & movie

-A bucket and car washing supplies

-Kitchen tools / pans and a brownie mix

*Experience gifts

-movie tickets

-live community theater tickets

-concert tickets

-sporting event tickets

There are a wealth of ideas for under $25.00 that will allow you to stay within your budget.

As I sat in the audience for the winter theatrical production where I teach, I looked around to see the space filled with more students than parents of students.  The show, as all of the ones at our school are, was wonderful; a fabulous comedy called Shakespeare in Hollywood.

I would like to thank all parents who actually support their children in their extra curricular choices.  You are helping your child become a well rounded individual.  You are your child’s support and strength, and you have a bond with your child.

I am, however, more in awe of those students who get involved on their own without any type of support at home.  The students who come to school and work to succeed and get involved while their home life is wrought with arguments and emotional abuse, where the parent says “That’s a stupid thing to be interested in,” rather than saying “That’s awesome that you were cast in the play,” even though they have absolutely no interest in theater.  My hat goes off in respect of the students who work hard during the school day, go to rehearsals or sports practice, and then go home to a house where they are expected to watch their brothers and sisters, make dinner, wash dishes, do the laundry, and various other so called chores.

To those of you students who fit this mold, I would like to give you a standing ovation.  Congratulations in your endeavors and keep reaching for the stars.

The holiday season tends to get many children overly stimulated which, in turn, makes many parents frustrated. This becomes obvious when bedtime rolls around. With young children, it is important to keep the bedtime routine to help them unwind and feel ready for bed.

During the holidays in my house, we followed the same routine even if we had been out later than normal. We did, however, add a few specials into the routine. During bath time, we played or sang Christmas songs and carols, especially the slower ones. Then, after dressing in the wooly, footy sleeper pajamas, a glass of milk was poured and we proceeded to the couch for story time. Story time during the holidays consisted of one or two special holiday or Christmas books. These were special books I took out the Friday after Thanksgiving and put away around New Year’s Eve. Since they were only read for four to six weeks a year, my boys snuggled in to listen: “The Shoemaker and the Elves,” “How the Grinch Stole Christmas,” “The Polar Express,” and of course “The Night Before Christmas.”

Then it was time to brush the teeth, get a last drink of water, say the prayers, and snuggle into bed. Sometimes, if it wasn’t too late, I put Christmas music on softly.

Even the most hectic day seemed to melt down as we settled into the bedtime routine.

If you live in one of the Northern states, you have probably seen your first snowfall.  I know I have.  It is so beautiful as it falls from the sky, but when it decides to land and gather on the sidewalks and roads, it doesn’t appear so beautiful anymore.

If it would just stay on the grass, I wouldn’t have to snow blow and shovel.  It’s not that I mind the task; it’s that the task usually needs to be done somewhere after 9:00 pm or I have to make sure to rise early enough before work that I can clear the driveway and sidewalk.

The first snow fall in this area dropped four inches.  The news shared tales of accidents and road hazards.  Now granted, most people haven’t driven in the snow for about eight months, but I find it utterly ridiculous that far too many people can’t remember to slow down, ease up on the brakes, begin to break earlier, or leave enough space between their car and the car in front of them to stop safely.  Along with that are the people who drop their speed 50% below the speed limit even though there is no accumulation on the road and the road is not slippery.

This year, give some common sense to your winter driving; slow down so you don’t lose control, but don’t go so slow that you are a traffic hazard.

In today’s fast paced society, the phenomenon is seen every day, everywhere:  cell phone addiction.  People are walking, people are driving, people are checking out at the grocery store or shopping for clothes while they are talking on the cell phone; people can even be heard talking on their cell phone while using the public rest room.

It is truly amazing that, with the invention of the cell phone and the little blue tooth adaptation that fits in the ear, many people haven’t a clue about communication between two people face to face.  Rather than put the cell phone on vibrate or silence, people will answer a ringing cell phone while in the middle of talking to someone else; or if they are not talking on the phone, they are texting someone while they are talking to you.  It is most unnerving to be engaged in a conversation and have the person’s cell phone ring, and have that person answer their phone and begin a conversation with the person on the phone.  We rarely have the other person’s undivided attention in a conversation anymore.

It is inconceivable to many people that they should hang up the phone when they order at fast food establishments or even in restaurants.  Shopping while talking on the cell phone has become normal behavior to many people.

Ladies and gentlemen.  It is time to relearn the etiquette for having a face to face conversation.  First, turn off the cell phone, or at least put it on vibrate.  Second, give the person you are having the conversation with your undivided attention.  Enjoy what the other person is saying.  Ask questions and contribute ideas and information.   Reclaim the politeness necessary for a face to face conversation.

This week I came face to face with another could-a, should-a, would-a event in my life.  Since I don’t subscribe to the local paper, my mother keeps me informed about the contents of the daily obituary pages.  She called Wednesday to ask if I knew that an uncle of my ex-husband’s had died.  Although he was 92, I was not expecting his death.  Three months earlier, his wife had passed away, and at the visitation, I told this uncle that I would bring my boys out and we would visit sometime.

As the funeral proceeded, I began to think about, and regret, all the could-a, should-a, would-a letters, visits, and activities that I have planned into my schedule but never accomplished.   As the holiday season commences this year, it is time to put an end to the could-a, should-a, would-a excuses that stand in the way of accomplishing the little tasks that other people appreciate.

Here is the could-a, should-a, would-a.  The last three months have been extremely chaotic and we hadn’t gotten out to see him; so as Thanksgiving approached, I thought that I would take the Friday after the holiday to visit relatives in nursing homes.  At the visitation and funeral today, I had the “I could-a made, should-a made, and I would-a made time in my schedule to have gone to visit him.  But…?”  It was the “but” that I couldn’t finish.  I really couldn’t find a “but” for a reason.